DIY Gilded Plant Stand

Why are plant stands so damn expensive?

A regular run-of-the-mill one from Home Depot will run you up to $100, about the same price as a cool mid-century one off of Etsy. It's a damn holder for plants, people. It doesn't do anything, except sit there.

Rather than shell out a hundred buckaroos for an inanimate object that I don't even like the aesthetics of, I decided to upgrade a cheapo one from Amazon. Like our old friend  Pepe Le Pew says, there ain't nothin' that some good ol' spray paint can't solve.

The original, made of wire-metal painted green, for $20:

I decided on gold to go along with that whole gilded Hollywood Regency thang that I've been into ever since I moved to LA and Craigslisted that amazing mid-century regency glass table (shown here at my old apartment).

First, a nice coat of Rust-Oleum primer, just to make it stick. Probably didn't need it, but just in case.

A quick two coats made this baby look shabby chic...

Or maybe just shabby. Next, the Midas Touch! Ooooh yeahhhh....

I got super excited when this spray paint can arrived in my mail. Did you know at most art and hardware stores you have to get someone to retrieve spray paint out of locked cabinets, I guess to deter graffiti? Seems dumb when you can just buy it online. Pretty much I want to paint everything gold now. All our planters? Gold. Our television? Gold. Two kitties? Gold! Speaking of kitties, someone was very disappointed he was not allowed outside while I was painting.

How come I'm never allowed to go outside and breathe paint fumes!

Next, two coats of gold spray paint in light strokes. This proved a little difficult because the plant stand was so thin and wiry and so much of the paint just went into the air. But I managed it without too much dripping.

24 hours outside to dry...

...and ta da! A gilded regency-style plant stand!

Now our dining nook is a full-on tropical jungle. Monkeys welcome.

Ruh roh. I've got the Midas OCD Touch. What else can I turn gold?
Which reminds me of one of my all-time favorite movies, which I used to watch on repeat with my old pal Ayana. This is basically me.